Rose Arcadia Banners, Blinkies & Reviews: How to Fix a Pretty Boy by @XquisiteProdigy

Italian Edward Cullen is the newest model to hit the scene, but treats everyone around him like dirt. Bella, his manager, is tired of his rude behavior. Can she change the "Prettiest Boy in the World?" AH.Rated M.Non-Canon.Lemon Flavored Extended One-Shot
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7072735/1/

This fic is so damn hilarious! Such a nice big fat break from the usual angst I prescribe! The dance goes a lil' something like this:

Edward is a pretty boy, cocky ass, full of himself Italian model. Bella is his bitchy manager who puts up with and gives him tons of shit. Somehow, somewhere along the way, the lust kicks into overdrive & then the love slaps them in the face. Of course, there's a bunch of silly & sometimes insane scenarios along the way.

It's just too much fun not to read, I'm tellin' ya! Just check out this lil' nip, the Twilight references in each line are too freakin' awesome (true fans will get them):

"This wasn't a choice between you and the celery. It was a choice between who I crunched and who I shouldn't be crunching."

"Have you ever considered that I might be the better carrot for you? You have a dip. I didn't. None of us did. But you do and you're dipping wrong! "

"I'm sorry damn it! Bella, when I look at you… all of a sudden, it's not dressing flavoring the bowl. Nothing else matters."

"You should have just let the chef boil the carrots and saved yourself all of this dip."

"You think I regret dipping you?"

"I can see that you do. I just don't know why."

"Then you don't know anything.

"Could you at least attempt to control your dipping?"

"Me? What about you? Did you sleep with him? 'Cause I swear, Bella, by the time I'm done with Jared Walker, you'll never want him again. Do you want to taste what I did when I dipped him? When I boiled him? When I shredded him? When I turned him into salad?"

"No, I didn't sleep with him. But I can't bring myself to regret the decisions that brought me face to face with his carrots. They also brought me ranch."

"I'll make it better, Bella. I'll make the carrots go away."

"You've already hurt me once. My whole family is angry with you. Daddy paid me $20 to give you this carrot. He said… 'we'll be dipping you'."

"I'm sorry I hurt your family. And you. Especially you. I love your salad. It's so fresh and crunchy. Is this what I was expecting? Carrots and tomatoes and olives?"

"No, not the olives."

"It's like Harvest Day all over again and you're the crunchy new carrot."

"Cullen, it doesn't make sense for you to want me. I'm nothing…A carrot. Nothing."

"Carrot, you're everything to me. Everything."

Not to mention, it has great lemons, loads of fun times & as of today, fucker is completed! That's right, I took too long making this banner and now the fic is done for you to enjoy in it's entirety!

So while you're reading, don't forget to leave a review for each chapter. If you have 10 minutes to read a chapter, you have 15 seconds to leave a smiley face :) review!

Hope X likes this banner, it's got it all...even Blue Shirt Girl holding the animation!